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Comics on the day’s news

Claude spent the weekend fixing other models’ bad habitsCoyote vs. Acme opens at 95% on the TomatometerAn ETF is a basket that trades like a stockSome quantum-gravity clues may be two maps of the same hillSara Bareilles turns a Lincoln Center lobby into a grief archiveBáez saved it, McGonigle ended it, Tigers 2-1A US Open guard’s wife weaponizes Tsitsipas quotesThe book nobody can read is still unreadClaude spent the weekend fixing other models’ bad habitsCoyote vs. Acme opens at 95% on the TomatometerAn ETF is a basket that trades like a stockSome quantum-gravity clues may be two maps of the same hillSara Bareilles turns a Lincoln Center lobby into a grief archiveBáez saved it, McGonigle ended it, Tigers 2-1A US Open guard’s wife weaponizes Tsitsipas quotesThe book nobody can read is still unread

Humor · SATIRE

Humor

Comics

Four-panel full-color humor comic with cartoon stand-ins. Panel 1: giant Slim Jim meat stick over an Omaha Nebraska skyline. Panel 2: workers stretching a tape measure along the snack. Panel 3: Guinness World Records certificate plaque. Panel 4: confetti crowd cheering a new world record. Verified length in prose is 429 feet 5.4 inches.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: UPI / Guinness World Records.

Humor · SATIRE

Slim Jim sets Guinness longest meat snack at 429 ft 5.4 in

UPI / Guinness: Sep 9 2026 Omaha Conagra campus; 429 feet 5.4 inches (130.896 m) beats Wenzel’s Farm 314 ft 11.53 in (2023). Nearly 430-foot stick. Cartoon only.

September 20, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic. Panel 1: cartoon horse ready for a parade. Panel 2: horse bolting with YEET burst. Panel 3: motorcycle officers and cowboy helpers. Panel 4: horse drinking water then rejoining the parade.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: UPI Odd News.

Humor · SATIRE

Santa Fe cops and cowboys wrangle a parade horse on Canyon Road

UPI Ben Hooper, Sept. 17: horse fled before Desfile de La Gente; motorcycles, bikes, animal services, drones, plus pro cowboys; owner trotted him back for water before the parade.

September 18, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic with cartoon stand-ins never celebrity likenesses. Panel 1: cartoon suburban house glowing with year-round Christmas lights next to a plain house. Panel 2: freaky induction dinner table with hypnotic spiral gag. Panel 3: rogue Santa rescue burst. Panel 4: theater marquee reading Christmas at the Kringles October 30 2026 nationwide.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: FirstShowing.

Humor · SATIRE

Briarcliff teases Christmas at the Kringles holiday horror comedy

FirstShowing, Sept. 16: Seversons vs year-round Christmas neighbors; Kevin Lewis directs; Ron Livingston, Rachel Bilson, Rob Riggle; US theaters Oct 30 2026 — not Sep 30. Cartoon only.

September 17, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic with cartoon stand-ins never likenesses. Panel 1: cartoon crowd at London Science Museum for Star Trek Day. Panel 2: many cartoon hands holding the Vulcan salute. Panel 3: scoreboard reading 934 Vulcan salutes in one minute. Panel 4: cartoon celebration with a Guinness World Records certificate stand-in.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: UPI.

Humor · SATIRE

934 Vulcan salutes in one minute set Guinness mark in London

UPI Odd News, Sept. 15: Star Trek Day Sept. 10 at London Science Museum; 934 salutes held one minute; 1,188 attendees; Martin Quinn guest; adjudicator Paulina Sapinska. Cartoon stand-ins only.

September 16, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic with cartoon stand-ins never likenesses. Panel 1: cartoon paper stacks on a YMCA racquetball court. Panel 2: seven-step paper-airplane fold chart ending in fly. Panel 3: scoreboard reading 415 paper planes in one hour. Panel 4: cartoon celebration with a Guinness World Records certificate stand-in.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: UPI.

Humor · SATIRE

David Rush folds 415 paper airplanes in one hour for Guinness

UPI Odd News, Sept. 14: Boise YMCA racquetball court; 7-fold process; assistants; ~8.67 sec/plane; May 30 attempt claimed the title; 200+ concurrent Guinness titles. Cartoon stand-ins only.

September 15, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic with cartoon stand-ins never likenesses. Panel 1: cartoon prairie farm near Burstall Saskatchewan. Panel 2: four cartoon sister stand-ins around a birthday cake. Panel 3: Guinness stamp reading 392 years 147 days highest combined age four living siblings. Panel 4: Airdrie Alberta verification board dated July 17.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: CJME / WestCentralOnline.

Humor · SATIRE

Roth sisters’ 392-year combined age sets Guinness four-sibling record

CJME/WestCentralOnline, Sept. 12: Anne Janke, Elsie Kirschenman, Viola Jassman, Idella Ehnisz — Burstall, Sask., roots; 392 years 147 days verified July 17 in Airdrie, Alta.

September 13, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic with a cartoon stand-in never a likeness. Panel 1: cartoon pogo rider beside a stack of Rubik's cubes in Nova Scotia. Panel 2: bouncing and twisting cubes mid-air. Panel 3: 211 record celebration at a stop button. Panel 4: open Guinness World Records 2027 book featuring the pogo-cube feat.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: UPI / SaltWire.

Humor · SATIRE

Saul Hafting’s 211 Rubik’s cubes on a pogo stick hits Guinness 2027 book

UPI, Sept. 11: Annapolis Royal, N.S., record-holder Saul Hafting, 21 — 211 cubes on a pogo stick (set 2021, confirmed 2022; prior record 65) — featured in Guinness World Records 2027, released ~Sept. 8.

September 12, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic. Panel 1: four cartoon disc-golf teammates staged at the tee. Panel 2: rapid chain of throws toward the basket. Panel 3: 44.31 seconds Guinness stamp. Panel 4: Mallard Park Idaho, PDGA hole at least 200 meters.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: UPI / Guinness World Records.

Humor · SATIRE

Four-person disc-golf team clocks a hole in 44.31 seconds

UPI, Sept. 9: David Rush, Travis Davidson, Anders, and Oliver set a Guinness fastest-hole mark after 60 attempts at Mallard Park, Idaho.

September 10, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic. Panel 1: two compact cars staged in Aruba. Panel 2: cartoon strongman restraining both. Panel 3: 13 seconds record stamp. Panel 4: twelve strength records trophy shelf.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: Guinness World Records.

Humor · SATIRE

Aruba strongman holds two cars for 13 seconds

Guinness World Records, Sept. 8: Egmond Molina sets longest time restraining two cars on rough Grapefield ground in San Nicolaas.

September 9, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic with a cartoon speed-eater stand-in, not a celebrity portrait. Panel 1: a giant burrito and a stopwatch frozen at 30.75 seconds. Panel 2: eight churros stacked in a one-minute challenge. Panel 3: a glowing kitchen scale reading 613 grams of strawberries. Panel 4: a trophy wall stamped 42 Guinness records.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: Guinness World Records.

Humor · SATIRE

Leah Shutkever reclaims burrito speed record at 30.75 seconds

At Guinness World Records HQ in London on Aug. 4, she also set marks for most churros in a minute (8) and most strawberries in a minute (613 g)—42 records total.

September 8, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic with cartoon stand-ins, not celebrity portraits. Panel 1: Venice festival crowd thrusting pens and phones. Panel 2: a giant speech bubble, Somebody get these beggars out of here. Panel 3: a cartoon actor in sunglasses laughing mid-autograph. Panel 4: a rubber stamp reading meme escaped the screen.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: Comic Basics / DiscussingFilm, Sept. 5–6, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Pattinson cracks up as a Venice fan yells his Odyssey beggars line

Comic Basics / DiscussingFilm clip, Sept. 5–6: outside the Primetime premiere, a fan shouted Antinous’s meme — and Rob lost it mid-autograph.

September 7, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic. Panel 1: cartoon ugly potatoes and carrots at Surrey Agriplex. Panel 2: huge crowd with two bags each. Panel 3: Guinness stamp 246,528.61 kg. Panel 4: imperfect produce parade, edible not trash.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: National Post, Sept. 5, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Ugly Potato Day breaks a Guinness produce giveaway record

National Post, Sept. 5: Surrey’s Cloverdale Agriplex handed out 246,528.61 kg of imperfect fruit and veg in 24 hours — about 543,501 pounds.

September 6, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic. Panel 1: cute Australian shepherd Chardonnay on a baseball outfield. Panel 2: dog leaping across 56 cartoon fans on all fours. Panel 3: stopwatch 16 seconds and Guinness record stamp. Panel 4: trainer with clipboard, looking at breaking it again.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: UPI Odd News, Sept. 2, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Chardonnay the Aussie jumps 56 backs for a Guinness mark

UPI, Sept. 2: at an Edmonton Riverhawks game, a 4-year-old Australian shepherd set the one-minute dog-jump record in 16 seconds.

September 4, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color bar comic. Panel 1: a long West Loop bar lined with tiny yellow-green shot glasses. Panel 2: a Guinness World Records stamp, 1,969 simultaneous Malört shots. Panel 3: cartoon patrons with lemon-pucker faces. Panel 4: a donation jar labeled Ravenswood Community Services, caption bad decision for a good cause.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: UPI Odd News, Sept. 1, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Chicago sets a Guinness record: 1,969 Malört shots at once

UPI, Sept. 1: Recess in the West Loop lined up 1,969 simultaneous Jeppson’s Malört shots for charity. The wormwood schnapps has been a Chicago dare since the 1930s.

September 2, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color funny comic. Panel 1: a cartoon collector wins a lumpy mounted fox head for £62,000. Panel 2: he points at teeth that are not a fox’s. Panel 3: a teal X-ray shows a complete thylacine skull in the stuffing. Panel 4: a database stamp reads not a fox, with a cartoon striped-tiger ghost high-five.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: BBC News, Aug. 26, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

£62,600 ‘fox’ head X-rays as a Tasmanian tiger

BBC Essex: collector James Cranfield bought a Bristol auction ‘antique fox’ that the International Thylacine Specimen Database has now verified by X-ray as a mounted thylacine head.

September 1, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel full-color humor comic: a cartoon pickup spills tubs of orange cheese balls on the 105 Freeway in Lynwood, westbound lanes turn into a snack blizzard, drivers hop out to grab unbroken tubs while a CHP officer facepalms, then crews sweep the asphalt and traffic rolls again. Original cartoon figures, no brand logos.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: ABC7 Los Angeles, Aug. 26, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Cheese balls take the 105, and Lynwood briefly goes grocery shopping

A pickup dumps about 120 tubs of orange snacks on the westbound Century Freeway; CHP says drivers stopped in traffic to grab the ones that didn’t burst.

August 31, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel comic: a tennis player at a credential desk, a guard checking a badge three times, the guard saying his wife loves the player’s quotes and uses them when he makes no sense, the player walking in smiling with a notebook.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: EssentiallySports, Aug. 29, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

A US Open guard’s wife weaponizes Tsitsipas quotes

Stefanos Tsitsipas got stopped three times at credentials, then learned the guard’s wife uses his philosophical one-liners to tell her husband he is making no sense.

August 30, 2026 at 7:00 AM PDT

Four-panel humor comic: a roster circle around Trey Smack, footballs through the uprights including a 59-yarder, three from 50-plus, the kicker walking off while quarterbacks wait on cuts.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: AP via CBS Sports, Aug. 29, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Trey Smack went 9 for 9, which is also his name

Green Bay’s sixth-round kicker finished the preseason perfect, including three from 50-plus and a long of 59, while the quarterbacks waited on cuts.

August 29, 2026 at 7:15 AM PDT

Four-panel humor comic: a fuzzy left-handed mascot on the mound, a radar gun at 79 mph, a broadcaster pointing out the name, fans holding CAN HE START signs.

Comic: Topics / Drew’s Comic Newsroom. Source: HITC citing MLB on X, Aug. 25, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Southpaw threw 79. In the suit.

MLB posted the White Sox mascot hitting 79 mph, noted that Southpaw is actually a southpaw, and the replies asked if he can start.

August 29, 2026 at 7:14 AM PDT

Three-panel comic. Spotted sheep leaves a pasture, sits on a bus with an ear-tag joke, rides a bus wash next to a soaked officer.

Original comic, Humor desk. News: UPI / Polizei Coesfeld / RVM, Aug. 20, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Next Stop, Home

In Lüdinghausen, Germany, a runaway sheep boarded an unlocked RVM bus, sat between the seats, then rode the depot’s bus wash while waiting for its owner. Police and staff stayed with it. The sheep went home by trailer. RVM said it gets a write-up in the staff magazine.

August 22, 2026 at 2:35 PM PDT

Three-panel comic. Beagles Diesel and Matilda plan a team project on a red velvet cake, eat it, then clap as golden retriever Milo wins the Hambone Award; stage tag says Nominees.

Original comic, Humor desk. News: UPI / Nationwide, Aug. 20, 2026.

Humor · SATIRE

Team Project

Nationwide’s 18th Hambone Award went to Milo Bear, a golden retriever lost 72 days near Lake Tahoe who came home thin but okay. Official runners-up were Henry, a Colorado Lab who punctured a paw on a rake, and Hobbes, a cat pinned by a garage door. Twin beagles Diesel and Matilda were other nominees; they ate a two-tier red velvet cake. All the pets recovered.

August 22, 2026 at 2:00 PM PDT

Neighborhood Watch comic strip: Saturday shift, sleeping baby, alert dog

Drews Comic Newsroom

Humor · SATIRE

Neighborhood Watch

Saturday edition: the baby slept through it. The dog did not.

August 22, 2026 at 8:25 AM PDT